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Lonely in a crowd

By Ustaz (Dr) Abdulfattah Adeyemi

Loneliness saps energies, kills dreams, and suppresses enthusiasm. Depression then combines with desperation in a lethal mix of anxiety that gnaws the heart in snacks. The spirit to perform is dampened; the will to excel is curtailed. The wing to soar is clipped and the step forward towards self actualization is suspended mid-air. We struggle to stand on one leg which also sinks into low self-esteem.

How many dancers would continue to dance when not watched? How many would sing when none will listen? Life would get boring when there is none to share our deepest thoughts and feelings with and none to care whether we are happy or sad.

The married could feel lonely when they have a spouse that is physically present but emotionally unavailable. This could be due to an unresolved quarrel, distractions from the outside, or senseless malice keeping, that is born of twisted ego and immaturity. These are provisionally, husbands without wives and wives without husbands.

You should note that surrounding yourself with so many brands of phones cannot dispel your loneliness. Rather, it could be a sign of a serious mental illness. Having thousands of contacts to chat with on the social media cannot replace a conversation with a real human being. Typing “Lol” with the supporting icons cannot substitute the original laughter from real friends, just like using an efficient Wi-Fi is not an alternative to a good WiFe.

You are not alone in this lonely world. Somebody somewhere thinks about you and wishes you well. But you have to reach out to reconnect with families who can cheer you up, colleagues who would check on you, friends who would go the extra mile to fill your voids, and acquaintances that are best of companies. You know, life is too short to spend it in a shell. Even the snail needs to stick out its neck if it must move forward.

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